Conversation for a Friday night
My wife: Do you think I have an unnatural preoccupation with baseball players' names?
Me: How do you mean?
My wife: I mean, Milton Bradley? And Albert Poo-holes? And Trot Nixon? And come on: Randy Johnson?
Me: You betcha. The Big Unit.
My wife: And that guy with the Norwegian first name and the Spanish last name?
Me: Einar Diaz.
My wife: Right! What were their parents thinking?
Me: Sweetie, I love you.
[Pause.]
My wife: I thought that might be followed by a "but..."
Me: I love your butt.
LOL, my husband never reads blogs, but I had to pull him over here and have him read that because it's totally a conversation we would have.
Posted by:SMIT | June 10, 2006 at 01:12
She forgot about Coco Crisp. I always have to giggle when he comes up to bat or makes a play in the field. I found it very funny when Milton Bradley and Coco Crisp were on the same Indians team. Being a Tigers fan we saw them a lot.
Still waiting for the lyrics to It's the most Wonderful Fart in my Butt =)
Posted by:Berg | June 10, 2006 at 08:30
I don't do fantasy baseball, but if I did, it'd be a team with entirely these sorts of guys.
Don't forget the most communist name ever, Vladimir Guerrero.
Posted by:techne | June 10, 2006 at 08:38
I have been remiss. She did mention Coco Crisp, as well as Edgardo Alfonzo and her current engrossment, Duaner ("Duaner?") Sanchez.
I didn't want you to think she was an obsessive. (Even though she totally is.)
Posted by:LOD | June 10, 2006 at 09:02
We don't even like or follow baseball, but the name Renteria always gives us a giggle.
"Urp, ooh, I seem to have a touch of the Renteria tonight."
Posted by:Jen | June 10, 2006 at 17:02
What about "Coco Crisp"!?!?!? (I know, I'm not the first to say it, but it cracks me up every time they say his name!)
Posted by:Amy | June 12, 2006 at 10:35
That was cute.
Posted by:Rose | June 12, 2006 at 20:05
what in hell is baseball?
Posted by:El Charulastra | June 12, 2006 at 20:38
Yeah, that's totally a converstaion my hubby and I would have too. But he'd grab my butt at the end, laugh, and walk off while I was left standing there not sure as to what just happened.
Posted by:Samantha | June 12, 2006 at 21:15
My favorite is Chone Figgins, who is operating under to woeful misundertanding that his first name is pronounced "Sean"
Posted by:camille | June 12, 2006 at 22:29
My husband would LOVE to have a conversation like that - but all I hear is
WAH WHA WHA - WHA WHA WHAAA A WAAAAA.
Posted by:Sharpie | June 13, 2006 at 08:47
At our house, we like to note the players who have the Latino-WASP combo names, like Wilton Veras, Hanley Ramirez, even Melky Cabrera (sounds like one of those nicknames, like Bitsy or Topsy). As I'm half Puerto Rican and my soon-husband is as WASPy as they come, this strikes us as funny. Of course, my all-time favorite Red Sox was Jose Offerman, that's a whole other level.
Posted by:emily | June 13, 2006 at 11:22
but the best name (other than Dick Trickle) has to be the old school b-ball player: Baskerville Holmes.
CAN YOU DIG IT??
Posted by:El Charulastra | June 13, 2006 at 14:25
one time my friends and I sat around and created the "all-pock-marked" baseball roster. we somehow managed to find a player to fit every position who was severely pock marked. we even had darrel evans in case we needed a designated hitter.
Posted by:dutch from sweet juniper | June 15, 2006 at 19:32
Tee hee, I like your wife even more now :-)
The nicknames also slay me...one of the most cerebral guys in the majors (Mussina) winds up being called "Moose." An extremely effective closer (Rivera) is tagged as one of the three stooges (Moe). And that's just the Yankees.
Posted by:Kate | June 16, 2006 at 08:07
What about Crash Davis? Does she know that there was really a guy named Crash Davis and it wasn't completely made up in the mind of Ron Shelton or Kevin Costner. I mean, c'mon, Crash?
And what about Grady Sizemore? Sounds like a porn name to me.
Posted by:Mrs. Chicky | June 16, 2006 at 23:00
"Crash" is a nickname for "Lawrence." So it doesn't count.
I love the name, though, especially if son #3 comes along. But it would violate my wife's rule that every name be worthy of a Supreme Court judge. Would you read a dissenting opinion from a guy named Crash?
Posted by:LOD | June 17, 2006 at 10:44
I seem to remember from law school days the following Supreme Court handles: Potter Stewart, Byron "Whizzer" White (the only justice who also played in the NFL), Salmon P. Chase, Bushrod Washington, and Horace Lurton. Also, my all-time favorite federal judge: Learned Hand. Now THAT is a porno name...
Posted by:emily | June 19, 2006 at 12:01